AP writes good
July 12, 2008 at 3:33 PM by Dr. Drang
Here’s the lead paragraph from this AP story:
Doctors and family members say a 7-year-old boy who fractured his skull when he was struck by a foul ball at Wrigley Field was recovering and expected to live.
The boy “fractured his skull”? Really? I know we’re all supposed to avoid passive voice in our writing, but the boy didn’t fracture his skull, the ball did. AP makes it sound like he hit himself on the head somehow after the ball struck him.
I not sure why this weird phrasing annoys me so much—the AP has done much worse in its political coverage—but I think it has something to do with what the boy’s parents would think if they read the story.
